Back to school, as a student

27th july 2018
Day of leaving school as a teacher is coming near. I have resigned and they have finalized the day and date - Tuesday, 31st July 2018.
Many things are playing withing mind. Shall I tell student about my leaving. When I will hand over various things to others, things (areas)I used to look after.
What next yoga course, extension in school or work or something else.
Heart is convinced to go for yoga course. Basic inquiry has been done.

I went to school in a school T-shirt. Instead of taking class, I allowed teachers to take the lead. I pretended almost whole day as a student. New admission. Except class with younger kids, kg2 and grade 1 kids.  It was fun to be like student. Real student kept on bringing and catching me at every nook and corner when I acted as teacher or found at place teacher goes.

30 and 31st July 2018
Game went on, I pretended most of the time as a student. Switching the role between student and teacher, wherever I liked and found necessary. They also enjoyed along. Few student of 4th and 5th grade wanted to take advantage. They started acting and tempting me to come out of the role.
I am just pretending. Can't really be a student, specially of their age group. Still it is a worth to try and find.

1st August 2018
I woke up early, around 4am. I have to get ready to reach the yoga institute by 9am and before that go home, collect documents and fee receipt. I left bhiwandi house around 5.10am. on good ground by 7.30am I was at goregaon. Took little bit rest, collected documents and left the place to reach Santacruz.
Dot 9am I am at the institute. It took a longer time to complete all formality, I was getting impatient. Classes will being by 10am. I waited. It's 10.45am and still no sign. I went to concern person and told, hope my class will not get miss. Can I go and attend the class. She agreed and I am in the class now.

First class itself set the tone and brought a new light which I was seeking. A much needed thing and it came.
Finally, I am a student again.
Going to be student for a month now.
I was waiting for this moment since March 2016, when I had registered and paid fees for this course. At that time, I followed the different call. Time was not ripen to attend this course in 2016. Time has come now and looking forward for wonderful learning.
At the end of a day, still in exahlated state. Out of three class two became special. One by the director of the institute, smt. Hansaji. And another a class on patanjali yoga sutra by vandana ma'am.

What is yoga?
A question with multiple answer, multi dimensional. Conscious and unconscious seeking of nature.

I will try to write more on learning, experiences and whatever else comes up.

Happy on being a student again. That's what I shared in introduction round too.

Till yesterday, I was a teacher in school and today, now I am a student among you.

Learning as a student

{Source: Google search}

As a learner life teaches us many things. Our education continues from birth to death. Every moment there is something to learn and progress to be made. Evolve into the future, into our better self. Consciously or Unconsciously we are learning. Our brain, mind, heart and body keeps on adapting and adjusting according to newer learning taking place. Sometime with our knowledge and acknowledgment, while many times without that. Life moves on. That's where a question needs to be asked "Are you learning as a student?"

What does this mean, ' learning as a student' in above context?

There are certain typical character or actions which belongs to a person who is a student. Like, student is seeking something beyond him/her. Student has a questions and seeks the answer. Student has some goal to achieve. Students wants to develop certain skills by learning from the teacher and putting them into practice. Ideal Student is sincere, attentive, aware, and so on...

When we just live our life, some of this characteristic of student are not present or present but in its lower state (can be called unconsciously present). Many unsolved problems and questions are there but in daily rut they are put aside. We can't put our 100% attention and occupy oneself only for finding answer, a difficult task.

Yet, there are few who are not just aware but consciously puts an effort to live and not just exist. When we do not just live our life (merely alive) but really live (full of awareness, joy and enthusiasm). They are student of Universe, or the life itself.

Thus asking again a question

Are you learning as a student, from the life/universe?

 

or

Does life just teaches you important lessons and you move on without learning?

PS: I started writing this blog post with intent to share my experience as a student in past 30 days (month of August 2018). I wanted to share few of the learning, feelings and much more. What I learn and found as a student at The Yoga Institute, Santacruz, Mumbai. It would have been simple if I just typed what I wrote yesterday night in diary. But this question "Are you learning as a student?" is very powerful right now for me. I hope this questions brings something to you too. If it does, do share your views/learning/experience on it. 

I hope to write down another post about the experience as a student in a day or two. Eti Shubham 

 

stories - images

सब झूठा, 
जगत कहानियों का ठेला। 

सत को भी पहनावे रूप अनेक, 
यह अदम मानव का खेल। 

 तू मानव , 
मन मे नाव चला 
कही नही जाना, कुछ नही पाना 
बस मजधारे ध्यान लगा।

----------

Images

Trying to manage image 
which others have about me 
Of good saintly brahmachary, sincere and bla bla 
Trying to create image which I set for I... 
Which is wavering and changes 
like movies in theatre screen. 
In midst of all image making,
 I is been lost
 Or 
watching all this 

Mind a trick master 
Ready to spin another image.. 
Please don't listen 
or
watch Another image

world of words

Past year
like all other year
lasted only for a year.

A trend i see
in writing which penned down.
Specially those in last year.
All had something very similar and typical.
One or Two word
which has caught the attention
whole drama were created around them.
One word and all its rhyme family
Making thousand meaning and connection.

In next moment
another word
another world
formations
symbols
sign
means
leading
meaning

where?

Hold

At different mode and mould
There are different hold.

When I was a baby someone's hold me, take care of me. I too wanted to hold each and everything.

 

When I am young, I want to hold. Only what I love the most. In rare case those which I want to give a blow or throw them away afar

When I will be old, I want some one again to hold. A support to walk and talk, to reach a final destination. 

When I came I wanted to hold everything...

From my mother's arm to her love and compassion.
From my father's palm to his patience and power.
From my teachers writing to wisdom and warmth.

But
When I will go away from this world, I can't hold anything along with me. Eventhough you will hold some memory, some belonging... How long?

In between there were so many things I have to hold and so many thing to give from what I held.

What I am holding?
Is I am holding body?
Is I am holding thoughts?
Is I am holding my anger?
Is I am holding my emotions?
Is I am holding views?
Is I am holding image of you and world?
Is I am holding I in itself?

No analogy is perfect...

Whether I say

Just flow on
Or
Hold the truth.

Wise one knows

When to hold and when to let it go?
What to hold and what to let it go?
Why to hold and why to let it go?
How to hold and how to let it go?
Where to hold and where to let it go?
How much to hold and how much to let it go?

And finally asks

Who is holding?
Who is letting go?
Who am I?

May the wise in you who holds the secrets. Answers all your questions which you are holding in and entering into this new year. It happens only when  you yourself will not held it back to go and ask.
In order to hold the supreme, don't hold back anything. 

As I am writing this, a word comes 'holder' leading to another word 'householder'.

True,
Householder knows what to hold and what not? Why? How? When? Where?

Nature knows, body knows, everyone knows.

(I have jumped and moved thrice on this topic and here come another one)

Can you hold river?
Can you hold air?
Can you hold space?

Just halt for a moment.

Just have a breath and than let it go.

It's a fine art my friend.
It's science, it's art my friend.

What?When?Why?Where?Who?How and how much? To hold and let it go.

I hold a deep respect and gratitude to many souls and I give it out... some who has held name and are living, some who haven't hold any name or not holding a body.

May in the year 2018 we learn this science and art of holding and giving.

Eti shubham. 

[ Hold is a noun, which i came to know now.]

When 2017 die?

Some lines, random... Towards end... Might not make sense.. as I am not writing to make a patter , a sense to understand.

When you are near there is no fear.
It's your dearness which creates fear.

From ear or from err
I get fear.
It like looking from rear mirror
Things are closer than they appear.
Who gets disappear

I fear on my rhyme and poem
Does that make any sense
Difference in sensing
Makes me at either ease or fear
That's a constant message I am sending
Past to future

Love is one.
Fear is dual, that's why it broads very near.

Zero is one, first
You add, subtract, multiply or divide you know what you going to get.

But not with
One.. as it comes second.
It can sense
Dual power
High low
Good bad
Happy sad

Wait a minute!
Have you waited?
Didn't I told to wait?
So it's like this I don't do what I sense or been told
Reason sometimes are lamb and too cold.
Lets have a hot tea and end fear of all toxin passed so far.

If you still have some fear, call them very near.
Stood in front face to face , don't show your ass.
That's the only way to ace the fear.
Love is one.

जिंदगी का प्रेम

तू मुझे चाहती है।
तू मुझसे नही चाहती।
इसीलिए ए जिंदगी तू आती हे
चुप के,
चुप के से चली जाती।

मन मेरा करता हे,
तुझे आगोश में लेने का।
पर यह भूत भविष्य के वेले
उनकी नजर से छुप के
तुझे कैसे पकड़ू।

तुझे देना है सब कुछ,
पर क्या दे?
वो यादें, कल्पना या सपने?

कहानी मेरी, श्याही तेरी
उम्मीद है प्रेम बहेगा गहेरा।