Here Rama Here Krishna

Here Ram Here Krishna

Hare Ram Hare Krishna . a usual chant we have heard. May be infinite times, in many kirtans and bhajan, after almost every aarti. It sets one on high ecstatic level. In this post, I am sharing something intimate, which is brewing since yesterday. and It has nothing to do with the chant but exactly what has written as a heading - 'Here Ram Here Krishna'. 

There is no typing or spelling mistake. Before You continue reading, certain stuff will sound like judgements and questioning some of the core stuff. May be that remain as it comes. So do not get shocked and if you have open mind, open mind and open will - than only continue reading.

शिक्षक से आचार्य : परिवर्तन

शिक्षक से आचार्य : परिवर्तन

आज से बारह (१२) साल पहले शिक्षक का पेशा मेरी परिघ् के बाहर था. हलकि उसे सन्मान की नज़र से देखते थे, पर कभी उसे पेशा नही बनाना चाहते थे. हद तो तब हुवी जब हमने शिक्षक प्रशिक्षण के ३ वर्षीय अभ्यासमे जुट गये, ९ साल पहले. वहा भी जब पूछा गया 'अभ्यास मे जुड़ने का कारण बताओ?' और मेरे उत्तर मे उन्होने पाया की मे शिक्षक नही बनना चाहता. तो भैया थोड़े हमसे नाराज़ भी हुवे थे. उस समय अगर कोई मुझे शिक्षक बोल दे तो मुझे चीड़ आती थी. वह शब्द मुझे बेहूदा, घटिया लगता था. मेरे ही समुदाय (मनुष्य) के कुछ लोगो ने उसे शायद ऐसा रूप दे दिया हे. शिक्षक - जो शिक्षा करता हे. वो जो पगार ले कर मस्त हे, घ्यान और ज्ञान  उपार्जन से त्रस्त हे. ऐसी कुछ छबि थी. और मुझे ऐसा चिला-चालू तो बनना नही. करना भी अलग हे, पढ़ना अओर पढ़ाना भी अलग से था. मिराम्बिका के शिक्षक प्रशिक्षण कार्यक्र्म मे जुड़ने का इरादा कुछ वही था, अपने को बदलना, थोड़ा अनुशासन जीवन् मे ले आना और योग के मार्ग पर चलना.
यह चीड़ २०१० से २०१८ तक रही. अभी कोई शिक्षक कह के बुलाता हे तो बस हलके से मुस्कुरा देता हू. क्यूंकी मिराम्बिका माई ने बहुत कुछ बदल दिया हे.
एक बदलाव का ऐसा किस्सा आज 'शिक्षक दिवस' पर टीचर प्लस मगेज़ीन मे छप्पा - यह लिंक से आप भी पढ़े.

अब यह मेरी मिराम्बिका माई ने बताया की बनना हो तो आचार्य बनो.
आचार्य शब्द का प्रचलित अर्थ तो सब जानते हे, जो अपने आचरण से द्रष्टांत दे. शिखना उसी से होज़ाये.
दूसरा अर्थ नियमो को तोड़ के आज मेरे सामने आया. जो सब कुछ श्रेष्ठता के, सत्य के चरण मे अर्पित कर दे वो आचार्य. क्यूंकी श्री माँ ने कहा 'उसे एक योगी और नायक बनना पड़ेगा, जो अच्छा शिक्षक हे|'  और योगी तो सब कुछ अर्पित कर देता हे श्री के चरणमे.

यह परिवर्तन सरल नही हे, बहुत कठिन हे. मज़े की बात यह हे की बच्चो के लिए प्यार. और  बच्चे ही हमको बदलाव के लिए याद दिलाते रहते हे. यह परिवर्तन कभी पूर्ण होगा की नही? यह बता पाना आसान नही हे. शायद जिंदगी भर यह क्र्म चलता रहे. मेरी माँ ने सब देख रखा हे. और इसीलिए एक सुंदर सी जगह पर, कुछ बच्चो के संग, यह परिवर्तन को जारी रख पा रहा हु.

  

why it comes to me?

In life we meet many coincidences, some we take for granted, few we feel lucky about, few we ignore and very few we cherish. When some coincidences keeps on happening with you again and again, we start wondering. Wednesday late night, it happen again.

I handed over rickshaw fare to driver. He took out change from his change bag near steering wheel. As soon as coin came out, my eyes were glowing. I knew this is the similar special coin, I am going to get another one. Heart was jumping on getting the coin in hand.

Above picture was taken on 3rd February when I had fifth coin from 'National Integration' series. 

Four different year of minting. After that, I have got two more coins. 

NATIONAL - INTEGRATION

National Integration, a phrase made of two words. Some strange but long association with the word I am having from past many years and may be from life. I knew the phrase in hindi, marathi and gujarati but in english came across the phrase 10 years ago. When I participated in All India Youth Came for National Integration. Participants and Facilitators from 13+ states of India. Learning, exploring and living together for 9 days in serene environment of Puducherry. A place where strong proponent of Nationalism, Sri Aurobindo spent half of his life in doing intense sadhana. 

During camp, we had one round of problems and solution for National Integration. Where different people got various chits and they had to share their views. Topic varied from ancient architecture, scripture, languages, current problems of pollution-population-terrorism-etc. I had got question on 'National Integration'. How to achieve National Integration? 

For many year the chit on which question was written were in my wallet. I don't know exactly why i had kept it and for how many years? I still might have it folded in partition of old wallet. There is something within which resonates and jumps up, when i hear about national integration. 

Since I lived little conscious life, I have memories of writing my first poem on Kargil War. While selecting stream in college after Xth examination or attempting for NCC after 12th. From selecting a career path, one thing was always there. Service to Nation. In my heart and mind, concept of service remains with much refine and better sense now. credit goes to The Master again.

Relation with nation might be from previous life or this one only or may be all this can be sheer coincidences of life. As they say what you think about you attract them more. I doubt they are mere coincidences. 

As a learner, one thing i am certain that there is still lots of work needs to be done. many misconceptions and ideas are prevalent among people, which requires fresh & true meaning. Even though one tries and work out a plan, execute with diligence to remove it, No big change will happen. Can't achieve National Integration with outward mechanical solutions. True and lasting change will only come when consciousness gets change. That's what Sri Aurobindo has told and I have a firm believe and trust on it. And change of consciousness always begins first from oneself, from within. Than it will spread outwards naturally when right time will come. 

Make the Balance - gujarati poem

ભોળવે છે માયા, રે મારી કાચી કાયા,
તંતના છૂટ્યો, બધેથી વળગ્યો
તંત્ર તેના કેવા, સર્વત્ર પ્રસરતા
યાત્રા કઠિન રે, ભોળવે છે માયા.


તંતુને તોડતા , તત્વ ને પકડતા
હરિ ગુણમાં લીન, તુ સંતુલન બનાવ

સમ વિષમ કેડી, ડરની છાયા
ભોળું મારુ મનડું, દર દર ભટકતું
સે ઝુલ્મો કાયા રે સહે,
આ માયા, કેવી રમતો રમે.

તંતુને તોડતા , તત્વ ને પકડતા
હરિ ગુણમાં લીન, તુ સંતુલન બનાવ

ચિંતનમાં ડૂબેલો, રાજ રમતમાં ખોયેલો
બુદ્ધિ થી બાવળ, સકળના પડે

તંતુને તોડતા , તત્વ ને પકડતા
હરિ ગુણમાં લીન, તુ સંતુલન બનાવ

- વૈભવ
૩૦-૦૩-૨૦૧૯

Puducherry Diary - Part X

After a gap of three years I went to puducherry. There were short of excitement as well as anxiety. About how things will shape up. From travelling, staying, meeting and learning. Concern , apprehensions, planning and so much of control we look. Yet.

There is always something unknown. Which we can call X of our life. In equation of life, we want to make our life equal to something. Equal to someone. 

We are given some constant like physical body, time, space and mind. Few variables which seems under our control and few which are not. All variables as well as constant seems under some influence. 

From what we know, our attempt is always to make things suitable, equal to other side of equation. Other side of our equation we want to set as per our expectation. Our projection and predictions of future. Our wish and demands from the universe for a better future.

Yet our ways to solve those linear or quadratice equation of life. Hinges on that one unknown factor X. 

Many approach work for putting a limit, differentiating each and every thing.

While few work for integrating and bringing X in.

If we would have known X.

What is this X in terms of Life?

On first two days of puducherry and one day in transition. I was setting up various equation to get the desirable outcome. 

R.H.S. = Desirable outcome = meeting friends, visiting place, doing things etc.

L.H.S. = time, space, contact details, schedule and planning

Did it ever happened everything you have set up on left hand side meets exactly like that on right hand side.

I know, answer will be NO.

Despite knowing this fact, many time we plan, worry and mind & emotions creates web for us. We tend to get caught and missed up in that web of creation.

Something similar, was happening with me too. But She was there to take hold and bring in change. All planning and scheduling thoughts were running on when I enter samadhi. It went on till I settled down at one place. And soon with Her grace, all of them also got settled and clear.

From that moment on... Many things worked out so well. Unexpected, unplanned meeting, visiting and doing... Life became more joyful and wonderful flow.

Just because the X, which generally remains unknown were known. One set whole of life based on the DIVINE PRESENCE. Which guided, and sets every equation right. 

Many time not equal to also appeared as X has set few more wonderous responses.

One need to find and then trust the X, the unknown of our life equation. Which not only solve our problem but also creates write equation of life.

line and curve in stories of life

"There is a meaning in each line and curve."

- Sri Aurobindo, Savitri, P.460

Today, February First marks six month being out of Job. Last six month spent in Exploring world through various lenses and finding a life.

31^st July 2018 was a last day in The Polymath School. Farewell has been a touchy thing. Specially when you have deep rooted connections. To organize simple task of putting cake and begin celebration, no one was coming forward and passing games were on. At the end, one has to stand and order, get oneself doing few part.

There are and will remain many stories around sudden move of mine. Leaving a established job, work, students, friends and many more. Especially when you been to USA tour for school purpose just a month back. Let all versions of stories remain with their respective speakers and listener. What I want to share today are two things – first and foremost questions and few pointers which lead to Resignation and early exit. Secondly, answering another question. What I am up to, now?

Why?

 It's been six months and many people still ask this questions. My answers are various stories, different each time either with all facts or few facts & rest. Sharing this also give me sense of clarity and way to share curent and next move. 

Questions and Pointer

1.      Are you under influence?

2.      What do you want to do?

3.      You say, I will do it in 2020 or from 2022 onwards. Why not now? Go for that Now.

4.      Going back to the root [words are altered here and put in more positive tone.  J ]

5.      Watching Marathi Movie, ‘Bucket-List’ (Madhuri Dixit’s first Marathi movie) [final seal on resignation letter, came after watching it.]

We are always under the influence of various forces of Nature. It is a Nature - human, animal, earth and others which acts in and through us most of time. Very few have a control, rest of us are always under some influence.  

-         What is meant by ‘sincere’?

-         Sincerity means to accept the Divine Influence only and not that of lower forces. – Sri Aurobindo (CWSA-29)

In simple terms I found that we are either influenced by Fear, Love and in between them.

Last six month went behind experimenting and finding what one wants. What are the things which affects and influence this being.

And what I wanted to start or do and live from 2022, when I will reach age of 35. I will be consecrating at the feet of The Master on his 150^th Birth anniversary. I intend to start and try to live from now onwards.

So, what is that... second part of sharing thus begins. Still all is in its very primitive stage. What I am sharing is few basic where about and work.

1.     Pause to the work of ‘School of Universal Life’ (S.O.U.L.) may be for a whole year. It is a pause till emergence of better program and formation of few things.

2.     Being Part of community living. Lovingly called Anahad – beyond limits. Here its location details, for those who are inquisitive to know more about what we are doing and other things please mail on jiyomatiry@gmail.com or call.

3.     Few project work in Mumbai as well support to few individual & organization will go on for a year or two.

But most importantly a base for all above is living a life. Life as one should – connected with Self, with nature and living from within. Goal is a transition from Teacher-Facilitator to Aacharya.

At the end of six months, here I am.

Filled with stories of past, its various versions heard and unheard.  With full of possibility in present and future to draw lines and curve, by connecting dots, weaving yet another stories. Looking back each line and curve holds a deeper meaning, moving somewhere. Now what is require is to see next connecting dot and next connecting dot and others are in direction of progress or not?

Eti Shubham

[Ref: http://sasp.collaboration.org/individual.html ]

Is life a circular road

Why I should think, talk and look atthe road not taken?
Isn't it I look at, think and talk about road I have taken.

If life is a circle, 
soon a point will come.
In fact at every next moment,
neighboring point waiting
asking with all its force.

And not with two options, Rather three. Would you like to move towards the center, a little next step? Would you like to move away from the center, a little next step? Would you like to keep the balance and 
move on maintaining the distance from the center?

At this very instant, I always wish to get a conviction, courage to tell, take me through and united forever with the center, love.

- Vaibhav Pandya

26/11/2018

--------------------------------------------------

Above words were somewhere roaming and forming from many days. Today, came across following video.

https://www.facebook.com/TEDEducation/playlist/177317723203840/?hc_location=ufi

A trigger to pen down.

Most quoted and searched poem of all time 'The Road Not Taken' by Robert Frost.

Few months back only, I had read few article, presenting one here.

https://nypost.com/2015/08/16/the-famous-robert-frost-poem-weve-read-wrong-forever/

which carries some mark and find voice in above words. As I write them, so many images and learning of philosophy to physics, human psychology to poems comes into mind.

So you glow..

Scuttle on shuttle of doubt;
When you hear something loud,
Failure again comes to meet
Disappointment grows still.

You feel dejected,
Rejecting all thoughts
Voids are made.
More voices transpire
Filling the void
Leaving all alone.

Left with voices around
Succumb to the pressure around
Shift you need
You know and fail to recall.
Opt out and face the trial.

A step ahead and two back,
Dark void, heavy weighs pulls you down.
Straight you stand, Look at center.
Light going in and out. 
Whether its sucking up all
Or emitting all out.

You want to share, look out for solace
Care of self, How can that entail?
Looking out, many stoppage around
Looking in, blank out.

In random talk, 
Wounds are shown a little.
Healing comes, throw wide
grow wise, with essence which whispers
Go Slow.

Be Still
Repeat again 'Go Slow'
Accept the flaw
Don't be tough and resist
Penetrate and just Flow.
Understand as you go.

You go slow.
So you glow.

- Vaibhav
19/11/2018

can you play, a safe game?

Mega game, called life
have you seen it? 
have you lived it? 
have you played it?
Ohh, wait... wait...

let me first find out
who I am? in this
Mega game called life.
I am a player or creator or spectator?
I am an umpire or groundsman or commentator?
Where i see myself?
all, I assume,
shall we resume?

Wait..

No!

Pause! can this be applied to
Mega game called life.
Just go on, or gone!
Really, not sure! 
are there only to options
go on or gone?
It seems so, but... but..

lets probe from somewhere else,
On what ground this game being played?
Is it a space or something else?
game so inclusive, can't see
on so many different grounds,
is it just one game with one innings or many
is it just one game or many games within a games
is it just one game at many grounds, 
where shall i found?
i said,
lets probe from somewhere else,
you always hit a wall
why you always search a fault?
every time you fall.
To make a wells,
you need to dig up well.

Fine, fine, shall we continue to play?
Where to begin but...
I don't see any start or end of it?
Ohh, Isn't you have end in your mind?
What are you saying? 
shall we not play with words and mind!
Ok. 
observe, isn't you always want to win.
a clear end in your mind.
which you always want to find.
whether you make sin, 
or shine.
it's hard to take rest
but one feel to be relax.
flex your arm
not always to follow
what you love
but just to do.

Just go on,
following the laws and rule,
following the foot steps
all the others do
you coward!
'cause your arm can be
flexed by others too.
so you flex your arm
play the game
try to win the race
kill the one
just become rest of one.
never rest
in fear of arrest
or is it other way round
arrested in rules of game
never you rest.
you change the rule,
do you even know the rule?
you change the rule, 
comfort and go on win.
relax, what's lacking in you?
fake and make believe
all goes on, in
Mega game called life.

is I am writing and
you are reading
to find what this game is all about?
to find some solutions of trivial problem of
Mega game called life.

I feel, let's get back to work,
just observe with openness 
ask, aspire to receive.
But you want 
you want everything predictable
you want to play safe
that's the reason you always get caught
Goal! never made, and wicket always fall.

Do you really like predictable games?
If answer is in big No.
how you enjoy and look always 
for and from predictable answers
predictable sources
dictator of its own kind.
if you can't find
go to those story teller
predictions! Predictions!
Pre and post
what you do all the time
post-mortem.

Let game go on
anyways, gone!

--------------------------------

How this piece came up?
So, around noon time came across a status on FB.
Where one of the thought which I used to share and tell a lot were written and explain in more rightful words. 'Everyone is a philosopher.'
Search began to find the article, around that. first i had a felling that i had wrote around it and posted here on blog. after few failures and reconfirming, I haven't. I looked up into old desktop. I found the file, but only with title and few link.
that's where I found another file and something more interesting came up. presenting only last line of it.

...But you see, we don't want to invite life, we want to play a safe game; and those who play a safe game die very safely. 

This words of J. Krishnamurti  resonated so well, at the current state of being. specially, when you are unemployed or self occupied in work. trying to find out how to live a life. 

So, words and images floated around. As usual, i tried to break the words to find the meaning. 

Like many other time, letters were separated. playing crossword. G - A - M - E... little rearrangement and it becomes M-E-G-A.

Thus,

Mega game called life.

and rest kept on flowing, some in making.

As i wrote down this prose, i again kept on asking google for its meaning. of different words.

and found a phrase... so here it goes.

Mega game called life,

hiding a gem called life.

so how this game of hide & seek going?

isn't this a safe game, 

we want to play.

we want to hide all that's ours and 

still keep on seeking, what's all out there.

what you seek, keeps on hiding from you. 

and you on hunt, 

hiding few things more and 

seeking few things less.

In the movement of moments

let change be new rule.

discover all hidden and show them out

what you seek, any way you going to get.

-vaibhav
26-10-2018

---

27-10-2018
again found a beautiful song, depicting the words in more musical and lyrical form.
game called life

learning by practice, again and again

[Thoughts as they came. No, place to bring coherence but see the pattern.]

It was three years back in October, 2015, I launched a project by name 'Jiyomaitry'.
There were many ideas, mere ideas, many wishful thinking and working alone.
Hosting and launching new workshops. All a flop show!
Working alone and trying to connect with all. Few attempt which never took place. All efforts, unknown greetings to unknown people. Resulting into nothing.

after month and half of just working... I was fad up. I could no longer stand and hear words of failure. I can not accept those failure. At same time, I can not share how it looks and assure others that this is just a phase.
December 2015, gave another dimensions. Travel, connect with people.
Connection again became a key word.

Now, after 3 years.
Some connection are made. deeper connection and relation of friendship with some beautiful people.
Virtual as well as physical. Now they have become a support system.

Three year back, I only use to work and suffocate within after every attempt.
In first session, only one person came. Who were there to support me, my gurubhai.
In second one, I was all alone. Still, I enjoyed being in nature. Juggling and doing tai-chi, other exercises as I had planned. All by myself. Girgaun Chowpatty. Observing Sun rise from the Mumbai beach. Something I never thought of. How is it possible?, I came in connection with real geography, real directions.

Connecting with your roots, soothes you.

Day before yesterday, Thanks to few friends at all level.
A first circle on parenting happened.
I saw a stark difference in me and around me.
I saw how she arranges circumstances for you. How she prepares you and makes you more solid. Condition, you have a faith and patience, a courage to walk again on the path.

I feel grateful to Her.
Heart is fulled, from nothing to everything. I don't know, the reason. a feeling of emptiness, as heavy as mountain. A pang of separation and beyond. Gratitude and void. Something is awaiting to born, to be made.

At thy lotus feet, O, Divine Mother.
Let Thy will be done.

Flow to Glow

Time is flowing...
Whoever flows, Glow
Who do not
Feels it low.
This is a law.
But do not
Seat and judge
Or make another fuss.
Simply you flow,
You glow.
Do not worry,
There is no hurry.
Hari is waiting
From a long time.
Patience he has a lot.
Perseverance we need to show,
But judge not
Based on your show.
Don't do for a show,
Just flow!
Lot many field to cover,
Lot to plow.
Plant a seed,
Forget the deed,
And you flow.
Leaving glow
For others.
Go,
You have read enough
Now, act and show.
Don't ask how to me.
Who am I to tell.
Just flow, go and do
Questions will emerge
And so does the answer
Remain in flow
Mellow your I
Do good to
Fellow around you.
Do good to you
, Be in a flow.

Vaibhav
15-10-2018
In response to ongoing WA conversation with SOUL.

Faith on Zero, Faith ON

---- unedited version---
(when)
There appears nothing,
It seems empty,
you can not do it.
simply you feel,
like a zero.
or
sometime those zeroes
reflecting in others.
No warmth, No love.
No understanding, courage.
No goodness.
All seems zero
In you, In others
all around
Nothing else but nothing.

But it appears like that.
go beneath, go behind, go beyond
to that appearances.
In thae space.
In that peace,
You will meet nothingness.
which holds all
when two zero combines (joins),
a new power is born.
An Infinite.
That's were you need to
have a patience and a faith
Faith on zero.

Faith on zero
knowing that it is there.
what eyes can not see
ears can not hear
DO not believe
have a faith in you
when you see zero,
in you and around
try to look, find & be
with other half of duality
connect the two
feel the oneness
Faith on Zero.

Just like a
Day contains day & night,
0 has 0 & its 1 number too.
So, if you meet zero.
be assured that,
you will meet one too.
Faith on zero.

 Vaibhav,
Van Niwas, Sri Aurobindo Ashram - Delhi Branch, himalayan center, Nainital
26/09/2018
----------

14-10-2018
Many times in our life,  we find nothing. Nothing valuable, good in ourselves. Not able to trust on others. One can't see any good things in others. All around what we see is greed, selfishness, cunning, hatred, violence and so on... every positive things looks in them and around as ZERO. sometime may be in negative. let's keep negative to all those sins... zero.
Mind can not trust.
That's were faith needs to be turned ON.
Need to bring that faith on zero.
a believe in oneself. At the very beginning and at the end, you are that. That Infinite. That Zero. A Hero. Even in middle, we are That, sometime visible sometime not, sometime manifested and not.. all

On 26/09/2018 - It was a concrete message. Message came early morning meditation, near shrine of Sri Aurobindo. many more event unfolded and very similar messages came on the way.
Today, when this pieces are getting written lot more things comes up. sharing few parts from the note of my diary on same date.

....આજે પોતાના પર આત્મવિશ્વાસ રાખવા, શ્રદ્ધા રાખવા. સર્વમાં તુજને  જોવા અને તેમા વિશ્વાસ / શ્રદ્ધા રાખવાનો સંદેશ તે આપ્યો......
જ્યાં જ્યાં શૂન્ય દેખાય, ત્યાં ત્યાં કાર્ય થાય.
આજ તો શૂન્યતાં મા સર્જન છે.....
મનના મૂળિયા તારામાં અને કર્મના ફળ સર્વના, ઍવો વિશાળ વટવૃક્ષ બને ઍવા બિજના અંકુરણ, તેને સાચાવ...

Need and Time

After writing yesterday's portion on learning style, today some sharing and reflections took place at friends place. One word which drew more attention was need. Finding learners need of learning, what learner must have or must do to become knower, doer in its most perfect way.{ Grateful to the teacher who asked few questions on my previous article. Without which could not have went little deeper into this word and it's aspect. Also grateful to srila di and the yoga institute for exercise on need, want and desire.}

One of the question which came to my mind was, does need has a tense?
Here are few random, unorganised chains of thoughts on answer of above question.

In simple terms..
Needs are always in a present.
Leaving apart need of breathing, eating, sleeping, and others such general ones. Needs can not be in past or of future.

I looked into dictionary. It says need is a verb with two different ways of knowing.
Something one must have or something one must do.

Needs are of two types, one which is constant and every moment/day one has to fulfilled it. Another which changes as per the development and cyclic nature of growth/person. Means in summer you feel a need to make yourself cool. But in winter same need is completely opposite in nature.
Need is nothing much but a bare minimum necessity. We as human crossed the bridge and made it two crowded , where we mixed need and wants..

Need is taken as a verb, except as common noun. As per business dictionary, need is a motivational force that compels action for its satisfaction. Needs are finite and wants are boundless.
Needs can be of necessities ,basic survival (should be called living) and those created by human per say social, intellectual and cultural, can be called necessaries. Still without few necessaries need one can live healthy, safe life.

Talking in learner need, it is a necessary point of development which learner wants to move ahead.

Needs are define primarily in present moment.. moment needs starts defining in future, as must have or must do... It becomes very easy to turn and sleep into demands, wants, desire..

There is something call developmental need. Like chile as it develop, at different stages it will require different sets of things. If one makes a progression graph of such need, it will mostly linear in nature. In terms of wants progression graphs keeps on growing even after satisfaction of it,some time quite exponentially.

What I really require? My basic needs to live a life on this beautiful earth.

Flower of Love

My heart, flower of love
Blossoms in spring of peace.
Soft and sweet, colorful petals I have
Stronger I, born from within
With grace of light, I grow upward
Generous, my hidden nature
In secrecy spread fragrance of bliss.


 year: 2011
------------
Thank you mirambika. For allowing flower of love to blossom.

With you I found meaning of expression through languages and art and other forms.
How important it is to express? ultimately whole of this world and its working is the projection, expression.

Above poem were written during one of its kind learning session at mirambika. Where we [teacher trainnes] were given five words and asked to make a prose out of it. Words given to us were: Love, Peace, Grace, Generous, Nature. 



 

Bout of Doubts

Bout of Doubts

When in self-doubt

One is in a big bout, against

self v/s self,

decision v/s decision,

thought v/s thought,

and so on.

There are many tout and touts,

for a ring to brought home again.

There is some time,

Actually, most of the time,

There is no meaning to stretch

further, it doesn't take us far

rather brings us down. 

Whenever in a self-doubt

first just bow-down

to universe and wisdom.

Take a deep breathe

Restore your trust on 

the wisdom.

"All is done for good and

will be for good."

Nothing less and more than good.

Are you reading for another

bout

with a 

doubt.

- Vaibhav , Platform No. 6/7, Vasai Road - 9:30Am, Wednesday, 08/02/2017

A first step

When child first takes steps & walks. When child first time speaks a word and call someone. When Child writes first time on paper. All that been done for first and done by everyone of us. Isn't that moment had brought a Joy, smiling faces all around! Lots of applause and Glee Shouts. A Confirmation of success, which makes us proud. Our efforts finally yield some reason.

Even after crossing childhood, much becoming adult and senior citizens. Our first attempt on something brings smile on our face and love one's around. Sometime its quite embracing too but mostly its overwhelming. Those sweet memory of our first attempt. Whether that first time be driving your car or  first time you proposed to your love or creating your Facebook account [specially for old ones] or Learning how to use smart phone! We feel that we have accomplished very valuable task. Sometime a task which seemed like reaching at pick of Mt. Everest.  Today I want to share one such incident of my life. An event that occurred exactly 10 years ago.

It was 20/10/2006, As per Indian Calendar an auspicious days of choti diwali [more known as kali choudas, narak chaturdashi,etc.]

A day I started writing.

What? You didn't wrote before that. No, Not like that I didn't wrote anything. But they were just writing one does in school and college. Writing one does either impress someone or to score marks [for may good marks!]. To tell you one fact, I started writing bit late compare to my classmates. My Mother told me that, that she used to ask almost every day to my Jr.K.G. teacher, whether I began writing or not? Reply was mostly in negative till end of first term. somewhere in sixth month of schooling, I had begun writing in school. I can't recall what all efforts my mother and teacher put behind me to do that.

So I began writing late, so this writing late is not surprising for me. I started writing around age of 20. As told, its not about schooling or educational writing nor about writing letters for work purpose to concern authority figure. In my case its also not about writing poem in Gujarati.

This writing is about writing an article in English for upcoming e-magazine of our online community. Also where I had to first time, in real-life [not in exams hall or classroom] to translate few material from Gujarati into English.

Story behind the article.

A year 2006 was very special year for me, for many reason. Most important and Highest stand is that year 2006 marks as a year I came to know about Sri Aurobindo.

Thanks to Gujarati monthly magazine 'Yug Shakti Gayatri' by AWGP. Issue of August 2006 was a special issue for Youth. It contained articles to guide and motivate youth. There were three articles where either Sri Aurobindo were mentioned, I still remember and have kept the copy very safely. Those article gave some glimpse of his life, work as yogi & freedom fighter, his influence on Indian Patriot, specially likes of Subhash Chandra Bose. Instantly I started admiring him and made him one of my idol in life. I thought to gather some more information about Sri Aurobindo. I don't know why? but surprisingly I searched on orkut and not google at that time. I found few groups/community on it and joined two of them. One of them 'In Search of The Mother' had amazing activities and discussion going on around. Soon conversations between me and admin of the group, Unknown M began. It was during one of those conversation, I shared about those article I read in magazine. That is when Unknown M, asked me to send them. As conversation went on, proposal came to write an article for upcoming e-magazine of community.

That time, I was more of 'Yes, I will do it. I want to do. That's way I will serve and give something for e-magazine.' Next day, yes 20/10/2006, writing began. Lots of thinking went on. Helping at house chores on festival day is like must, thus less time to complete work. It somehow happened, took three days in total to complete. In fact some of the translation part, basic idea and framework were done while travelling in a BEST's bus. That bus ride was interesting as due to Eid on 20/10 and Diwali 21/10, traffic jam was huge. That's reason, I was able to write something, as bus wasn't moving much.
Article had many errors, few unsuccessful attempt for correction were done. I sent with note of request to check and edit mistakes.

Yet, group published the article almost as it is in e-magazine. [link] or blog post

That's how it began. Thanks a lot Unknown M [ and still I don't know who is Unknown M?]

All Gratitude at lotus feet of Divine. Who made all this happen.

I will continue more about this writing journey in next blog. [hopefully tomorrow. About important figure on this journey of writing.]

Sanedo...

Couple of years back I used to hate Sanedo,
a year or little more I used to enjoy but dislike Sanedo;
everything change few days back,
now I not just enjoy but love Sanedo.

Q: What brought this transformation?
Ans: Moved by Love, ' start-up services' retreat.

On very first day, first thing I heard after silent walk, welcoming greetings and soothing music. A word 'Sanedo' and how joyful it is. I said to myself, uff! Sanedo is here too, I don't like it. But when they explained origin and its meaning. Everything started moving and changing. Whole position got changed and I reached to extreme.

What is the meaning of sanedo?
The original pronunciation and word is snehdo(Gujarati: સ્નેહડો), derived from the word sneh (Gujarati: સ્નેહ), meaning love or affection. Sanedo contains couplets of four lines and has a striking resemblance to bhavai, a folk drama form from Gujarat.

I played[danced] on sanedo for thrice during retreat and effect it had was amazing. more than that tune was accompanying me till now. In such state some words were scribbled down and a new sanedo has been formed. 

let's go for snehdo...

આ નાણું મારું, બધા ગાતા આ ગાણું;
આ નાણું મારું, પાડે મોટું કાણુ;
એક ટંકના ભાણા હારું, ભાન ભુલાવે સાલું લાલ સનેડો.. સનેડો સનેડો નાણાનો સનેડો... સનેડો સનેડો

ખાણ ખોદી, ડુંગર ખડકે; માલ લાદી, જગતે ભટકે;
વાદી ભેદી જાતને કટકે, નાણા હારું જાતને પટકે.... પોતે ખોદેલી ખાણમાં... સનેડો.. નાણાનો સનેડો... સનેડો સનેડો સનેડો લાલ સનેડો

ગર્તાની નીરાશામાં, શીખરોની આશામાં,
નાણું વ્હાવે એ નાણામાં.. વ્હાણ ચલાવવાં સાગરમાં લાલ સનેડો..સનેડો.. નાણાનો સનેડો... સનેડો સનેડો સનેડો લાલ સનેડો

મુલ્ય સમજી, મુળમાં રહે; જગત જગદીશ દિલમાં રહે;
મર્મ સાથે કર્મ કરી, ફુલ-ફળ સર્વે વેરે...
નાણા ને તે નાથી લે... નાણું તેનું સાથી રે લાલ સનેડો... સનેડો.. નાણાનો સનેડો... સનેડો સનેડો સનેડો લાલ સનેડો

Translation [not word to word]
this money is mine, everyone is singing this song
this money is mine, makes big big hole
for one time of food, it makes us forget our self ... sanedo

by digging mines, it creates mountain;
imposing goods on back, it roams everywhere in world;
with isms, secrets, self divide.. it throws away self into mine for want of money... sanedo..






In deep depression of loss, to hope of reaching at top of mountain,
 spending money in a drainage[channel], to move the ship in sea... sanedo

understanding true value, who remains in root,
who keeps world and lord in his/her heart;
does all action with right attitude/understanding and gives fruits and flowers everywhere...
such human is able to kill menace of money. and money becomes true friend of those... sanedoo.


--------------------
Thank you jagdish bhai from sri arvind sadhana kendra ahmedabad for tea and wonderful conversation. from where I got this line 'આ નાણું મારું, પાડે મોટું કાણુ'.

Lots of thanks to khusmita Di and Rahul bhai for making sanedo lovely and lively part of retreat. waiting for singing & dancing, moving and spreading love everywhere.

Junglee

After spending three hours in jungle, I felt I am junglee.

I want to sing aloud,

याहू!
चाहे कोई मुझे जंगली कहे
कहने दो जी कहता रहे
हम प्यार के तूफ़ानों में घिरे हैं
हम क्या करें
याहू!

मेरे सीने में भी दिल है, हैं मेरे भी कुछ अरमान
मुझे पत्थर तो न समझो, मैं हूँ आख़िर एक इन्सान
राह मेरी वही, जिसपे दुनिया चली
चाहे कोई मुझे …

एक मुद्दत से ये तूफ़ाँ मेरे सीने में थे बेचैन
क्या छुपाऊँ, क्या छुपा है, जब मिलते हैं नैन से नैन
सब्र कैसे करूँ, क्यूँ किसीसे डरूँ
चाहे कोई मुझे …

सर्द आहें कह रही हैं, है ये कैसी बला की आग
सोते-सोते ज़िंदगानी घबराके उठी है जाग
मैं यहाँ से वहाँ, जैसे ये आसमाँ
चाहे कोई मुझे …

Even though song has been filmed as romantic and depicts romanticized Hero in its attempt to make heroine his.

Yet words are such that it moves above romantic and moving towards True Love.

few lines are perfectly telling what I want to share.

first loudly want to say, Yahoooooo....

चाहे कोई मुझे जंगली कहे - Yes, as person living in India been called Indian, in America called American and so on.. similarly why not person living in Jungle be called Junglee.. Whether jungle is natural or artificial (concrete).

हम प्यार के तूफ़ानों में घिरे हैं - Always surrounded in torrent of love.. love synonyms of Supreme, Divine.

actually each line has impact and a story... so rather than deciphering each and every line...

coming to last one..

सोते-सोते ज़िंदगानी घबराके उठी है जाग - Remove this line from the song and read aloud. So far I was sleeping, this whole life was sleeping and now it has awaken as fear has smashed me so hard. Fear of loosing my true self, getting corrupt, loosing friendship with myself. I do not want to submit and live in a rut. I don't want to be part of rat race going on in concrete jungle.  

Yahoooo.. Now I have friend, I want to keep that amity alive.. within...

[watch/listen song yahoo too on youtube. While you do, for time being just listen and forget that it is romantic song but plain listening and find what emotions it evokes in you? what kind of thoughts comes?

Youtube link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDH8uzVcRds]