What does it mean , to feel broken?
I do not know!
What is the difference between
being broken and being open?
I do not know?
Can one naturally become broken
pieces of whoever it was?
I do not know?
There is something
which want to come out
how far you like to keep it in
shorter or longer, not
a success defy.
This strange sensation
moment before breaking
a sound about to sought
water about to wave
looking for a crack
opening to come out
or is it
opening to go within?
Broken promises,
Scattered dreams
twinkling like a star
in my empty sky.
It's been a surprise for me,
How thought to write a blog on death came to mind few moments back.
I had started writing on something in morning, but it wasn't working right. There was a desire to make 201st post, something special.
But ...
I no longer wonder - in recent past came across the word, thoughts and reflection around death.
As thought arrived very first thing i observed the word 'eat' within 'death'. How wonderful, isn't it!
DEATH - Divine Eats His creation. annihilation.
No one wants to experience this.
Everyone thinks it happens at the end or something which finishes everything.
How stupid such mind to believe that it happens at the end and finishes everything?
Death is present in very present.
Kaal is another name of death - Samay - Time.
And this constantly nagging thought of do - work - finish up else kaal will come... we keep on hearing but mind sleeps off in myriad of sensory enjoyment.
That's remind me of Kabir and his words.
Expressed in this song by Neeraj Arya's Kabir Cafe in modern version...
All our smartness is nothing in front of him.
So far, I had one equation given by my master, Pt. Sri Ram Sharma Acharya - Life = Time
We all love life, but life moves on, just like Time.
So logically, equation comes down to this
Death = Kaal (0)
kaal = time - (1)
life = time - (2)
From equation, (0), (1) and (2),
life = death
Is there any difference... !!
A powerful equation to base your life upon.
Once one start working based on the above equation, i guess there will no loner any question.
little word play here too - only one letter differs question and equation. moment something goes 's' silence , 'a' answer arrives. so moment you are that silence, answer of everything... equation and question become same.
Death brings so many association, shivering in spine. So many right and wrong things we keep on doing, without realizing death is going on. It is always there, forever present.
Death - a point to contemplate about.
Every moment, as time passes I die and this false identity wants to stick with that past image. It want to create new, bigger and better pictures in continuation of that identity, without dying. How is that possible? one has to embrace death and than move ahead.
Die every moment and be born every moment. forever child.
Are you ready to die? Right now?
die for being better version of yourself
die for something larger than yourself.
but die, what is kept in living, sticking with already dead. die is new living.
Fearless, Love ... ufff... all of them ... moment I die... I live...
To live truly live in now. die now.
diving in death, emerging in life
Lord of death, wants to bind you in those dead images, wants you to see non-existent images, that which is not existence can not be alive, it needs to be dead too.
Stop this logic mind, and experience it.
Yesterday, I watched a video and later on shared it on blog too. Since than I am feeling grateful to my parent and feeling of awe & gratitude is increasing with every passing moments. More and more things are getting revealed.
I do not know how they knew it, my real issues, a challenges I need to solve. They are still present and keeps on bugging me. They were present before too. I have attempted many times to resolve, overcome and dissolve them. one such issue i shared it yesterday - flip flop. What surprises me is they are still present. A small victory over them is not sufficient, I guess! these beings might be waiting for when I become weak and can attack back, infect me with their strong stings.
Issues looks like eternal, whether they are within me and around.
Fight against them seems eternal, till complete victory is won.
Whether its corruption or abuse, racism to rape and all other ill's
I see them present somewhere within, so subtle so tiny-miny mixed with others
closely knit with some opposite thoughts. tender tendancy a prey of them.
----
At this moment, I feel like asking them (parent), how did they sense my issues and challenges. Something i need to overcome to achieve. a path, simple and straight. Me taking always detour.
They know the issue and thus they keep on showing you mirror. That's what brings irritation in me. No longer able to stand and face them. So i shut the communication, go away, run away from all of that. I no longer afford that, consistently running away, shutting up. It is time to open up and embrace.
Embrace the pain!
As quote on my desktop wallpaper says -
As I reflect, observe and introspect ( are they possible all at once or i do not know which one is the most appropriate here? may be the later is true)
I found something more but not a right time & place to share.
Let me thank them one more time, silently , openly.
Who wants to be flop?
You, Me or We!
No one wants to be
but its easy to slide
a downward slope.
I have an issue
which makes my attempt flop
might not be seen
out, but very much on
in present past
so subtle now
that comes as a surprise
takes me on a ride
by the time it gets
some another tide
It seems I need to tie
myself with big anchor
some calls it sankalp
yes, that is an issue
desires moving freely
unquenched
making decisions go flip-flop
just like a hit-me-not
without a base,
topple any side
and get hit from all the sides
flip-flop
a sure sign
for making a flop
I know,
I have it.
I know,
How to deal with
but I know only.
I am trying
bringing it in Do
do-do-do-do
require a quiet a lot of strength.
I can still put a blame
on someone or on circumstances
No! I can't make more excuse
have to try out
bring in all courage to
remain stick.
no more flip-flop
do not apply a logic
as you know its a gate to flop
don't go aflot
come back and toil
ground is available
here and now
no more flip-flop
let me plough
grace will come
and harvest will shine.
-----------------------------
Written in a state of constant flip-flop going on at subtle level and manifesting at outer.
whether its money, marriage or work or simple daily task to eat or not? there is a flip-flop.
can a control, a order come in? Yes, Very much. and as one dwells, observers and work upon.
Right time, guidance comes. Here is one such source.
In between Sri Rama & Sri Krishna, you will find appearance of ______________
When one sees the life of Lord Sri Rama and Lord Sri Krishna from surface level. What one finds is contrary, two extremes view points. Many time logical rational mind stops working after baffling with thoughts 'around who is the ideal to follow?'
As one starts observing one's own mind and look at the source, core principle on which life of our great heroes revolve around. One starts getting a sense that there is more than what mind can comprehend. Habitually mind looks at the part and forgets the context presented by place, time and circumstances. Why mind does like that? Maybe mind has been trained to work in that way - Observe - bisect - make small pieces - investigate - understand - plan - apply - analysis - repeat. This seems a process mind follows. Wait! there is actually few steps more in the process about which we are not yet trained fully, consciously. After apply, there is a reflection and synthesis as well at plan and apply level flexibility or say allowance for emergence is need to be taken care along with initial process from observe to understand one can not afford to forget the framework in which (context) all this is done. Once three important point of reflection & synthesis, allowance for emergence and keeping context in mind. we will find something emerging in our mind. Allows us to go higher than the mind.
And when we see the life of our two heroes little more intimately, we will find that there are many common points. One among them is standing up for the values which was most appropriate and needed to safe guard in their time. One will soon find that such situation arises in everyone's life too. There is a gradual evolution, a progression of mind - to set life on higher & higher principles. Not to misuse the gift and live rightfully. Leading on the path... In between doubt-Belief-faith; restrain - freedom - Equanimity...
... Somewhere we will meet, in between Sri Rama & Sri Krishna - Buddha. A Buddha who is in you.
A guide to handle both the extreme of the life.
Life full of actions & rest, serious & joyful. Ability to hold contradictions, dillema, paradox life presents.
On the day of Buddha Purnima, May our soul sets on fire. In between Sri Rama and Sri Krishna, we also meet Lord Buddha. May we find our middle ground to hold the value, unique & special to us. Just like each one of them hold few values and principle.
PS Note:
There are plenty of stuff, which I can not write and describe right now. Nor i thing I have such ability or language gives me such power. If its unclear, let it be. If it offends someone, I am sorry! forgive me. Writing is also somewhere influence by writings of Sri Aurobindo and what he has talked/written about them.
Hare Ram Hare Krishna . a usual chant we have heard. May be infinite times, in many kirtans and bhajan, after almost every aarti. It sets one on high ecstatic level. In this post, I am sharing something intimate, which is brewing since yesterday. and It has nothing to do with the chant but exactly what has written as a heading - 'Here Ram Here Krishna'.
There is no typing or spelling mistake. Before You continue reading, certain stuff will sound like judgements and questioning some of the core stuff. May be that remain as it comes. So do not get shocked and if you have open mind, open mind and open will - than only continue reading.
